We went in to the clinic this afternoon to see the RE. She asked where we had done the u/s yesterday. I felt gratified that she was angry over the no internal, as well. She did an internal and confirmed that there was no heartbeat. The baby is dead.
I got dressed, and we all went in to her office to talk. We discussed what happens next. She said that there were three options. We can schedule a D&C, we can wait for a miscarriage to happen naturally, or she can give me pills to put in my vagina that will probably cause the miscarriage to start within a couple of days. She said that it could possibly take weeks for it to happen naturally. The pills, I know, actually cause labor, which can make for a very painful and violent miscarriage. She said that, after I was done bleeding, I would need to go to the ER so they could check and make sure everything had come out. I expressed that both of the miscarrying at home options terrified me, and she agreed that it could be bad, especially as I would never know when it might start. I could be in the grocery store and have a huge gush of blood while shopping.
We also talked about whether or not we wanted to test the fetus for possible genetic abnormalities. Most miscarriages are due to genetic problems, and the guys only have one embryo left. But, as the eggs were from an egg donor, she would have been screened for the major genetic disorders. So, this was probably just a fluke. Plus, to PGD the remaining embryo would be costly, and could possibly damage it. Normally, they do PGD before the embryos are ever frozen. This one would have to be thawed, tested, and refrozen, each step of which ups the risk. Or, we can just try again. We may end up with another miscarriage, or we may end up with a perfect baby.
Of course, the decision was the guys' to make. But, they very kindly asked me what I thought. They don't want me to have to go through this again, so they said they were willing to test this baby and PGD the remaining embryo if it would make me feel better. I said it wasn't necessary.
The RE said that, when I get my next regular perion, we can schedule another HSG, and we can take it from there. So, we're looking at probably starting again in the fall.
I was so afraid that I was going to be blamed, and that the RE would tell the guys to start with somebody new. But, everybody was very supportive. I was relieved.
I got dressed, and we all went in to her office to talk. We discussed what happens next. She said that there were three options. We can schedule a D&C, we can wait for a miscarriage to happen naturally, or she can give me pills to put in my vagina that will probably cause the miscarriage to start within a couple of days. She said that it could possibly take weeks for it to happen naturally. The pills, I know, actually cause labor, which can make for a very painful and violent miscarriage. She said that, after I was done bleeding, I would need to go to the ER so they could check and make sure everything had come out. I expressed that both of the miscarrying at home options terrified me, and she agreed that it could be bad, especially as I would never know when it might start. I could be in the grocery store and have a huge gush of blood while shopping.
We also talked about whether or not we wanted to test the fetus for possible genetic abnormalities. Most miscarriages are due to genetic problems, and the guys only have one embryo left. But, as the eggs were from an egg donor, she would have been screened for the major genetic disorders. So, this was probably just a fluke. Plus, to PGD the remaining embryo would be costly, and could possibly damage it. Normally, they do PGD before the embryos are ever frozen. This one would have to be thawed, tested, and refrozen, each step of which ups the risk. Or, we can just try again. We may end up with another miscarriage, or we may end up with a perfect baby.
Of course, the decision was the guys' to make. But, they very kindly asked me what I thought. They don't want me to have to go through this again, so they said they were willing to test this baby and PGD the remaining embryo if it would make me feel better. I said it wasn't necessary.
The RE said that, when I get my next regular perion, we can schedule another HSG, and we can take it from there. So, we're looking at probably starting again in the fall.
I was so afraid that I was going to be blamed, and that the RE would tell the guys to start with somebody new. But, everybody was very supportive. I was relieved.
No comments:
Post a Comment